Dinner was very good, and our waiter’s service was excellent, but everything was not okay. There was one problem. It was the presentation of the meal. It was not how the meal looked or the food presentation on the plate. It was how the waiter presented herself as she served the food. Her hands and nails appeared very dirty. This situation required feedback. I had a choice to write a public review or verbally give her or her manager feedback.
Even in a church environment, maybe even more so, there will be occasions where feedback is necessary. However, we must determine how to give it, the best way to give it, the best time to give it, and even where to provide it, such as the place and location. Foremost, what will the feedback consist of? Good intentional feedback must be clear and direct. Church Professionals should consider these criteria before initiating feedback conversations. Feedback should aim for change, improvements, and positive future outcomes.
After paying for our meal, I asked the server if I could speak with her privately. I started with positive feedback by commending her on the best service. However, noting that the appearance of her hands and nails made the food almost unappetizing. She apologized and stated she had a broken ink pen in her apron pocket that had gotten everywhere. What a relief.
Now add to the above criteria who to give the feedback to: the person directly or to a connected or interested third party. In this case, I’m thankful that I did not provide the feedback to her manager. The objective was to drive personal improvement and not to get her in trouble. As church professionals, we have to make these feedback decisions, too. Ask yourself what the objective of giving feedback is. Is it for positive or negative consequences? Is it for conflict or resolution? Is it for peace and goodwill or vengeance? As church professionals and ministry leaders, we also are waiters. We will be in a position to both give and receive feedback. We hope the feedback provided is provided correctly for the right reasons and to the correct individual based on the intended results. Again, as waiters, we are accountable for how we serve and give and receive feedback.
